I’m not to sure if that title makes sense, so I will explain it a bit more. I’m a bit of a self proclaimed expert on personality disorders. I’ve talk to many and read thousands of posts in the closed support groups on face book. And if two or even ten people have the same disorder, they will all virtually think the same. Male or female, young or old and doesn’t matter what country there from. You as a person have a way of thinking and who you are. Then there is the disorder that has its own way of making you think and it cant be changed.
Its often posted in the groups “no body understand me” and everyone will comment that it is the case as well. Its not that people don’t understand you. They don’t understand the disorder that at times is making you think in a certain way that is nothing like the rest of us. Getting up set as no one understands, is like sticking up for the disorder and not even you. It not possible for someone to understand how this disorder is making you think if they have never had it.
About a year ago I first joined the support groups on facebook. If you have a mental illness check them out. They are massive and will find heaps of like minded people on there. My ex-partner was a bad type narcissist and I joined a group which is for victims and not for people with the disorder. I didn’t have any mental illness but there were plenty on there that did and after a little while I could see how some people were saying exactly the same thing.
I felt good still and was on there as support more than anything to help people get over there abuser. I didn’t know anything about mental illness before this but after a while I worked out a few things on how to stay mentally strong and could help people with anxiety and depression a bit. I didn’t know at the time that there was no cure for either and its a bit haisy in how you even get it, but on these support sights its very clear. It’s from the mental abuse 100% of the time.
I joined a depression and anxiety support group, which are even bigger than the narc groups and it was like everyone was the same. And then I would see a post that I could relate to and every time it was from a victim of narcissist abuse and they didn’t even know it. They had more the ten disorders from a life time of all kinds of abuse and they were all the same as well. They were needing help big time and they were good to help, but someone with depression or anxiety would go missing if you were going to help em.
It really stood out early to me as the posts in depression groups are so negative and not even close to being rational, and that its not really the person saying it, it was the disorder and could pretty much predict answers and how things would go with someone with depression or anxiety. I even joined some other groups and they all would think the same depending on the disorder.
As I worked out more and more how you get these disorders and how they are, I began to think of ways how to fix them. Well you can fix the person and the disorder will go, but you cant do anything with the actual disorder. It is like a set way of thinking and is a complete waste of time to even try.
Its a long story but I ended up with anxiety from being in a mental hospital for 62 days as my ex partner had convinced the psychs that she was terrified of me. It was as bad as it gets and was struggling to even hold off the suicide thoughts which I had never had before. But I had helped fix a couple of anxiety disorders before and new exactly what to do. I assume it was easier for me than anyone else as I only had it for less than 2 months but I remember the difference in how I felt the minute I woke up and the anxiety was gone and instantly all the worry and thoughts I was having were gone as well.
Its clear to me how a disorder is like an addition to your thought process and not really you doing a lot of the thinking. I had keep telling my self that when I had anxiety and it was true 100%. Its not that big of a deal, but if there is ever going to be any recovery out of mental illness for people and it sure as hell doesn’t look like there will ever be that a big part of it will be understanding on the person to want to get rid of the disorder that isn’t really them