Mental Illness, emotions and the mind

I have found that ones mental state whether strong or weak is determined from what your mind has gone through. That a mental illness is a result of particular emotions being in such a weak state that a mental illness or a personality disorder becomes an attachment to the thought process of the mind to stop the decline in the state of ones emotions. It keeps you at a low state emotionally but stops the decline of a person mind to dangerous levels that would be unbearable to live with. A person emotional growth primarily occurs early in life and mostly determined by those closest to the person and often dependant on. Mentally strong people being raised in ideal and loving circumstances that allowed for emotions to get strong over a long period of time down to people with a variety of disorders that have gone through less than ideal up bringing and onto being abused as children. How emotions are effected in a person is from thoughts from there mind and the mind gets its thoughts from what it is exposed to. The mind is our brain and it learns from what it is exposed to and try’s to solve life’s problems that we encounter naturally. It can only learn from what it is taught and depending on its strength will determine how well it is able to solve and learn and how we go through life.

That a humans emotions are part of our human instincts that give us a feeling if something or really a thought we are having is good or bad. This feeling we feel inside if we like something or not is our instincts trying to guide us through life in the best possible way by being attracted to the good feeling we feel from things. We should go to those good feelings as that is what makes us emotionally stronger.

Our mind is naturally learning and solving problems all the time and living a full life exposes our mind to new and interesting things which makes us stronger emotionally as we enjoy the feeling. Being bored and experiencing negative things in life gives us a bad feeling and makes us emotionally weaker. It makes our mind try to think through these low times and causes a cyclical negative thoughts to be had which damage us emotionally over and over and closer to a level emotionally where a disorder can take effect.

Emotions and the mind at birth are virtually blank with just our human instincts to rely on. That how we grow emotionally has to be learned from those we are dependant on and factors that relate to how we are mentally will be from our life experience. That we are all born the same emotionally and they are just that feeling of good or bad every time we go through something. How we are and what we believe is determined from what we experience in life and not from how we are born or any hereditary things. We can be like our parents because we have learned from them and its not a natural occurrence.

There is currently no reasons for mental illness or cure for mental illness the above is not established and we look for causes of mental illness in any area except for what we go through mentally and how it effects us emotionally. We known there is a correlation between being mentally ill and those who have been abused but there is much stronger correlations present. And that is that our whole mentally will correlate to what we have been through whether good or bad.

To fix someone with mental illness will require a strengthening of them emotionally and that will have to come from there own mind. Also this is difficult because a disorder has attached itself to there way of thought that often is negative in nature. Possibly working out ways to distract a disorder is the only way of repair and that means living a fuller and more active life if that’s at all possible.

The reason why it is obvious that a disorder attaches it self to ones mind and becomes a set way of thinking for some that isn’t logical is the similarities in people thoughts wheather man or woman and from any culture being the same while others with out any type of disorder having completely different thought process. Also those with the more extreme kind of disorders having children and these children all turning out the same emotionally often with many of the same mental illness.



Ever wonder why some people are addicted to gambling. It cant have anything to do with it hurting you physically like a drug might be able to, so it must be some form of mental addiction. I used to be addicted to poker machines and its got nothing to do with wanting money or easy money. I think even gamblers know that you are not going to win any money from gambling. I think I used to play until I was poor. I wasn’t happy till I had lost all my money it felt like at times. When I really needed money for something are the times I wouldn’t play as I knew to have money I needed to work and save and not to play poker machines.

So why would so many people be throwing there money away and causing themselves all kinds of issues from being broke that would be easy fixed by simply not playing these machines. Well the answer is really simple. Gambling is a distraction in life that allows a person who might have some problems or issues in life relief from dealing with them. it provides an instant forget to your everyday life problems and clears your head to enjoy other thoughts from your reality that you are not happy with on the inside.

You may not even be aware that you have any problems in your life but there will be something. In my case I was in a boring job that provided me with not enough mental stimulation nor was I working hard enough. I was a prison officer without any problems but I could never stop this addiction to gambling no matter how hard I tried. I tried many times to just stop and I just never could. I didn’t understand the problem and it didn’t feel like I was that addicted to it even.

I quit my job and started working for myself and got that mental and psychical stimulation and quit gambling with out even trying. What I done effectively was solve the real issue that was causing me to be addicted to gambling. My mind didn’t need the distraction from everyday life that was my life and I was now satisfied in my own skin and broke away from the need of this distraction that I had deep down inside of me.

Poker machine addiction works like this and probably a lot of addictions that don’t seem that bad on the surface. You don’t feel there is that much of a problem as you are not hanging out for a fix like a drug for example. But you are drawn to them and will promise yourself to maybe only put 20 bucks in them. But once you start your mind is distracted from your reality and your mind is now thinking about other things. Your thinking about all sorts of things at a rapid rate and its something your mind enjoys the feeling of. You have a brain that enjoys these quick thoughts that don’t cause it to worry about what ever the worries are in your life.

It may feel like on the surface that you don’t have to think much playing a poker machine and you don’t, but your brain or mind is enjoying this sensation you are providing it with. There is the constant calculation of each win and the calculation of what you nearly won against the calculation of what you just lost as well as the hope of the feature. The hope of winning money and the worry of losing it with your thoughts of how you going to make the money back and that you shouldn’t be doing it and will stop after say 50 more dollars and a whole heap of little things your mind goes through while your simply just pushing the button. Your brain enjoys all this thoughts it is having and in my case was distracted away from being left dormant in a life I had set up that required very little thought or effort and something deep down I was not happy with.

When your finished and your lost all your money is also part of the addiction. Now your mind or your brain has to click into action as you now do have a few problems and worry’s in your life caused by the fact that your have blown all your money. And even this is a better feeling for your mind that having it feeling like it is not being used enough or your thoughts being a bit dormant and not even aware of what your real problems are in life.

It works the same for a lot of addictions. The trick is to become addicted to things that cause a positive effect in your life. Become addicted to things that fulfil the needs of your brain and you will be happy. Fix the deep underlining problem or issues you have in life and you wont feel have the need for distractions that are nearly impossible to even know what they all mean and leave you dismayed as to why you are doing something that is causing you harm and a problem in life that you do not want.  Fix the issue, understand what is the problem, take care of that problem completely and it will be the solution. Take shortcuts and not being aware of the real problem will mean your solution to trying to solve a problem doesn’t work and your pushing that button again and going no where in life.


rrrrThis is how to fix a mental illness. Im not saying its possible to achieve the end goal. I think it is possible  to see the way to actually fix any disorder that exists though.  There are a lot of variable that need to be defined in a new way to even get an understanding of how to fix a mental illness.

The two most important concepts are emotions and thoughts. When you have a thought in your head you get a feeling inside. This is your emotions telling you if the thought you had is good or bad for you. If the feeling is good you get a strengthening of your emotions and a bad feeling will weaken your emotions. People who are strong emotionally are characterised with a life where they have had there thoughts being mostly positive. A good life from an early age develops a person emotions to be strong and able to handle occasional negative thoughts. On the flip side someone weak emotionally will be characterised with a life of too many negative thoughts weakening them emotionally with occasional positive thoughts providing relief from there suffering of feeling weak emotionally.

Possibly it is best explained by your childhood. Lets say that is from the age of 0 to 18years old. I had a good child hood. Im 44 now and every thought of my life as a child is a good thought. Sure there were moments or things that happened that would of effected me negatively but are so out weighed by the positive that its impossible for me remember them as bad times and only have good feelings of my childhood. Now put all these positive thoughts over my life time against a child who had a violent upbringing for example. Remembering things like laying in your bed scared out of your brain un able to sleep or even make sense of it all as the thoughts you have when your mind thinks about your past will be a constant negative feel you will have inside emotionally making you feel weak emotionally.

While your awake your brain is constantly thinking about something on some level. It would be millions of thoughts. I estimate up until the age of 42 my brain would of had 10 million positive thoughts versus half a million negative thoughts and I was very strong emotionally and basically never had a bad day in my life. Those negative thoughts were nothing super intense and I was way to strong emotionally for them to be an issue anyway. Reverse that equation with a child from a violent upbringing and magnify those negative thoughts with a 100 time magnitude and feel how a person emotions would of taken such a beating negatively that you would be emotionally so weak that allows for some type of mental illness or many to be encountered. Emotionally strong people don’t get mental illnesses, its only for people who have had negative thoughts on a level that weakened emotions to a certain level that a disorder presented itself as a way of protecting them against there own mind destroying themselves emotionally. Children who had violent upbringings often have various mental illness like ADHD, depression, anxiety and schitizophrenia amongst others. Simply put a human is not able to emotionally go through adversity as a child and develop strong emotions due to having negative thoughts of there life constantly making them emotionally weak. Emotions simply do not work like that. You go through something bad and it effects your emotions and that’s just how they work.

It doesn’t have to be something as serious as violence. Something as simple as a parent not being encouraging enough or a bit negative will cause an emotions in a child to be exposed constantly to something negative and making them weaker emotionally. Weaker emotions can spiral downward with constant negative thoughts they are easily had when there are negative things to think about of the past. A person may even be able to remember a childhood they didn’t enjoy and cant see that anything even bad happened to them in there childhood. Maybe they had depression from an early age and cant even know why. But the answer is simple always. For some reason your mind had negative thoughts on a level that made you emotionally weak to the point where you took on emotionally depression disorder. Now its hard not to have negative thoughts as the depression has these thoughts for you weather you like it or not and turning this around might be or seem like mission impossible.

But over the last little while due to a bit of bad luck you could say, i’ve had more negative thoughts about issues that my brain is not able to cope as there are a lot of negatives and emotionally I am getting weaker. Every negative thought im aware of and spend most of my days now trying to distract myself with things that don’t allow me to just think about all the negativity that im going through. Its nothing I can control and just put out of my mind, its just something i’ve got to go through and hope I get through it.

Without going into the whole long story, I was basically diagnosed with a delusion disorder where I believed my ex-partner is a malignant narcissist. You could say that there not the nicest thing to have a relationship with and can make up things that other people including psychiatrist believe and you end up on anti-psychotic medication that is compulsory and has a side effect of servere anxiety that gives you constant negative thoughts and worries in life where I have to literally try to spend most of my time distracting myself from negative thoughts, mainly about the medication that is hurting me emotionally so much.   Going from being strong emotionally straight into anxiety disorder is a hard jump to have to go through. Im having all these negative thoughts and worry’s about this ridiculous situation I find myself in instead of being able to go through the normal thought processes of my real life drama’s that I would of been able to cope with as I was strong enough emotionally.

Im able to feel this weakening of myself emotionally and basically have got to hang on and not get to emotionally weak before I get off this medication and able to repair myself emotionally. But its made me aware of how emotions work and I think they work the same for everyone.

But this is the key or the theorem in how to fix a mental illness.  For those with some sort of disorder are you able to somehow be able to stop your mind having thoughts that weaken your emotions and turn it all around and get strong emotionally. Im not sure how possible that is when you got some type of disorder in a way doing the negative thinking for you on top of being emotionally weak and a past that has your mind remembering bad times is not a way to get emotionally strong.

I guess I see a fairy tale type solution of being able to fix a mental illness of developing some sort of life style that has a positive direction and so interesting that your distracted from whatever mental illness on such a scale that doesn’t allow for your mental illness to do the thinking for you or for you to remember  things in the past that hurt you emotionally and get constant new positive thoughts from a lifestyle that some how miraculessly comes around that is of constant excitement and positivity while being able to un confuse your mind that has all these built up thoughts and remember such bad times that are impossible to forget as the overall theory to how you fix a mental illness or a disorder.  Not saying its possible but I guess anything along these lines is the way to at least feel better. For me its hang on to my hat time and try not to fall to hard.  Writing is a distraction for me and allows for me to think clearly and a break from the negative thoughts that is my new life that im desperately trying to avoid.


How you get ‘ANXIETY’

There are two main ways you get anxiety. I also know a third way and that is how I got it and what I have now. Its a not very fun illness and is the second time I have had it. You may say how can you get it twice as there is no real cure for anxiety if your in the anxiety game.

I got anxiety as a side effect from the medication I was mis-prescribed aand got it that way. I was forced to take anti-psychotics due to what they thought was a delusion disorder. There was no delusion and they were taking the word of someone who said she was terrified of me. Its a different type of disorder that becomes terrified of someone when they try to get them help for there disorder. It called manipulation and a long story but I’m 44 and had no mental illness until I took these anti-psychotics and got anxiety.

Life is not very fun with anxiety like I have it, the first time round I was suicidal and worrying about every little thing and was the most restless person on the planet I think. I got it the second time the same as the first time and still have it now. I usually write about mental health and depression as I understood that lllness more and how you get it and how you get rid of it, but I worked out how you get anxiety the main two ways.

I don’t know if it can be classes as proper anxiety as it a side effect from medication and went away when the medication wore off the first time but for sure it was a bad anxiety that I’ve experienced and still experiencing. I can tell you that when I came out of anxiety disorder I knew immediately it was gone and text some people in relief at 2 in the morning when I woke up on the sofa. I can tell you how you can get rid of it but im not sure its that possible as its about how you think and its not easy to change that but I see the two main ways that you get anxiety are from the following.

The first way is from some form of abuse whether psychical or mental abuse where you went back into an unpleasant environment that your emotions were giving you a feeling inside that was negative and you continued to expose yourself in this environment. Generally that is when you got it bad at home and over and over you go back into an abuseive environment you are not enjoying and you become more and more anxious at the very thought of it. Your brain thinks over and over about the unpleasant situation and the constant repeative worry about something puts a strain on your emotions and you develop a disorder called anxiety.

The other way is that you are taught to be anxious by someone, I guess your parent as that who teaches you thing when your growing up. Instead of beig encouraged to do things you are always told to not or to be careful or this and that will happen from a young age and you develop this worry about everything kind of attitude and end up not doing all the fun things out there and experiencing life for yourself. Your kind of taught to worry about things in your mind instead of just doing things and experiencing them and you develop anxiety, from again too much worrying and a weakening of your emotions by the over thinking process.

At this low level of emotional strength and high repeative thought process you emotions become to strained and you develop the disorder anxiety where you stay in this more constant type worry even if the issue that caused you anxiety is gone. Often adults can get it as well from being in an abusive relationship and there emotios not wanting to be in that environment and sometimes not that easy to get out of that situation due to financial pressures or just that you are a two forgiving of a person. Or they may get it from going into a state of constant worry about everything in life due to just the pressures of day to day activities.

Look out for blogs in the next few days about how you get rid of anxiety. Im sure you have been told before to not worry and it will be along those lies but I will think of ways not to worry and wont just tell you not to. I know that not possible when you got anxiety as I have it too. But you should know or be able to work out how you got anxiety from one of these two ways or something at least a little bit similar and if your ever going to fix a problem then you got to know what the problem was in the first place


Leave a comment if you have any ideas. Im not familiar with anxiety medications so I wont be able to help you there but what ever floats your boat and helps you through the days with this disorder is what you got to do at times… Is anyone one else impotent with it. Ten Viagra’s are not going to allow sex with me. Im getting a new psych to get off this medication soon and until then . Don’t worry, I got this about to be worked out how you fix this dam anxiety


For a minute, just pretend your 2 yrs old, yep pretend your still pooping your pants…. Your not just learning what your parents are teaching you, you developing everything,your looking at stuff you have never seen before, your eating things you never tasted before, you smelling, hearing and there is stuff going on and around you and your little brain just takes a bit in from everything..

A simple trip to the local store will be an adventure for a 2 yr old…you might start off walking, holding mums hand, you see bus, car, car, truck, horn, tree, train go past, other kids, people talking, a dog, mums pointing out things so you learn words, few little road rules hear and there, careful of the doggy, look a flower, another bus goes past and your now saying baa, baa.

You worked out that if you see this big looking thing on the road and say baa, baa, mum thinks you great and gives you a cuddle. Walking along the footpath and your 2 yr old, you going to do all sorts of near accident things.. Your hearing careful, hurry up, don’t touch the dog, get your hand out of your mouth, . All simple little words of advice from your mum and you just taking little bits in as you can I guess….

Life more complex these days, and there is more to learn and less time to do it. People are more careful as well and don’t think as much for them selvers either these days. You go to kindy earlier, and by the time you hit 3yr old that 50 trips to the shops is not go to do the same job as the 300 or so you would of had 40 years ago. There was no kindy back then, there was only one car and that was at work with your dad

You had all day with your mum to cruise through and discover things at your own pace.. So what if a dog was cruising past, most people had one any way. You had a longer leash to discover and families where much tighter, More kids to play with and life had much more flow for a little child… There was “less don’t do this don’t do that”, there was more go play with billy and you learn things so much better from experience..
Im sure my dad knew exactly what he was doing when I stacked my bike a few times and lost the skin off my knees.. He was Australian road champion. It was the highlight of my 4 yr olds getting mended and back out with the other kids, and it was on the road at the end of the street. I knew those road rules by the age of 5 and was normal to be in the outdoors playing all the time. No computers or anything back then..

We lived near the beach and I was swimming day one of kindy 4 1/2, no swimming lessons, by 7 I was riding to the beach with the older kids, and they knew how to save you if you got into trouble… You played sport on the weekends, you played sport at home, you played till you dropped everyday and then you ate your dinner, if you liked it or not, it was all just too easy.. Shut you fingers in the draw, who cares, you only do it once and you work it out..

The point im trying to make is that life has changed and and these disorders like ADHD are multiplying.. but there is less time to learn things and more that needs to be learnt. Kids brains have not changed… Evolution takes millions of years.

There is no clue out there to what even causes ADHD and the like..A child’s brain learns a lot of things step by step, where if there are steps missed, then the brain simply wont be able to think about something it has never learned before, Young children are still developing emotionally, they can loose confidence in there ability to even think and ability to solve life’s little puzzles. They can loose attension span and fall behind, loose friends if they cant play properly, You can fall behind and no one is there to pick you up….A young child can be annoying and easily frustrated when he can’t do something right, Then we become frustrated and shorter with how we teach em, instead of the other way around..
This is a disorder, and people have got to live there lives like this. They don’t know the cause of it and there is no cure and its multiplying rapidily. It can be fixed though. My boy had it before the age of four, so I worked less and went back to basics. We grabbed the dog and went bush and explored. Out in the bush along the river there is time to think and talk. There was no phone to interupt and out there there is no wrong or stop, don’t do this… its all just fun and the ADHD was gone in weeks.

Lives are changing so fast, ADHD is increasing fast to, but little boys are still the same as they were 50 or 5000 years ago like our knowledge of this disorder

Ideas on cause of ADHD

Could ADHD be as simple as this??
ADHD is a mental disorder that is very common and increasing at such an increasing rate it’s a bit of worry. If you talk to some people, it’s the doctors just diagnosing and putting the kids on drugs for no reason. But if you talk to the people with kids who have the disorder, it’s a lot more serious than that.

Looking at how lives are changing might be a logical reason why ADHD and similar mental disorders are increasing. You only have to go back a couple of generations and life was completely different. There was not this life style of both parents working to try and buy a house and support a family. There was a lot more time to spend with the kids.

Go back another couple of generations there was not even cars and trucks, buses and trains, all of which are the favourite toys of little boys… One of the first things a young boy is able to work out in there brain and yell out when they go past is CAR or they see a train and there little brain clicks into gear and yells out TRAIN and for a mum or dad its so funny, but your also so proud at the the same time..

The brain for a human is like our big advantage over other animals, we can learn on such a higher level to solve all of life’s little solutions, but its still the same brain from one hundred years or so, but the world has changed at a rapid rate. No one has ever thought that we need to change how kids may learn to keep up with these changing times.

Your brain can only learn as a child in a step by step way… I like maths and will try to explain what I mean by step by step… after many steps a child may be at the stage of trying to compute simple addition.. If steps have been missed and he is not ready and doesn’t know numbers are quite yet and its all a bit hazy to them, there brain just will not work in these situations, there will not be any thought even and it will be a shut down of there brain or just to think of something that there capable of.. It might be also that there brain has missed steps in how to switch on and start thinking and this is all happening at an extremely fast pace around the 2,3 and 4 year old age….

Kids are looking for love and praise and trying to do there best and can be really frustrating for them if there not keeping up and loose confidence and there brain can loose its way. Possibly disorders can start and psychologist, psychologists don’t know anything about this kind of thing, People are to busy to notice and its to late before you realize there is something really wrong. Ithink its possible that its something as simple as this as a start to where ADHD and similar disorders come from where there are no solution or reasons to why they come about


I worked out how the mind works… step by step, and here is a bit of fun to help you understand

Im so sick of my family calling me a fat cu@t, when will it all stop…

That’s a bit rough isn’t it, being called a fat cunt from you own family. And not just just once or one person, the whole lot of em. No bloody wonder she has anxiety and depression and she still a kid at school.
I thought, that’s not right saying cu@t in that spot, and I can slip this word into my prayers before bed. Thanks cu@t, I say. And he sweet with that and around the boys its part of vocabulary, and its never been discussed in history as its just known that you ease off with the word in a lot of situations and then drop it completely when you get to the stage of a child. I don’t know how old she is, she is a school kid. She has a psychiatrist, psychologist, school councillor and of course there are teachers and friends and none of them do anything to help her.
Also she would of created a fake profile to get into a big support group, where she gets support, this helps a bit and when I first met Jessica and its not her name, there were 200 messages of support and then im able to write some messages that interest her and everyone else doesn’t matter and when she starts to struggle she just says hello and we have a little chat..
Its because she has been crying out for somone to understand her, and even this low level abuse that is the bottom of the range from what my ex partner does is easy peasy to understand/ To get up to being able to understand the effects of it, isn’t in the scope of even psychiatrist can understand…
Whole sections of psychiatry are dedicated to teen suicide and not doing a thing, there tearing there hair out and pumping the money into it and there not even close to saving a girl.. She will go to therapy and they will be trying to understand her and when they understand something then there brain will relate to what they can understand and it will be the one thing that doesn’t mate like, whats “the dogs name” .
Here are some comments and I will post mine as well see if you understand//..  the support is good for people, but they don’t understand themselves either


SUPPORT COMMENT What are you? 5 years old?

SUPPORT COMMENT Fat is normal…what if ppl call you crazy, that really reached inside

SUPPORT COMMENT Fat is defined differently across countries, you can be quite skinny by many different definitions and still be called fat :/ In China the girls are so skinny, only a few pounds into normal weight here in the USA and they will be considered “fat.” The world is strange.

SUPPORT COMMENT Just ignore them, whether you’re fat, black, white, skinny, short or anything is what you are. For as long as you’re a good guy/girl, who cares about that

JESSICAIn my house, having about one muffin is considered being fat or not going for a walk cuz of assessment being due & cuz I have no motivation is considered fat

SUPPORT COMMENT 1 muffin? I’m lucky I can eat the whole Costco chocolate chip muffin pack XD

JESSICA I’m far from the sporty type even though I’m good at sports. I’ve got a home workout already (set up by my therapist) yes I’m still in school but I’m nearly finished.

SUPPORT COMMENT If you are graduating this year, congrats.
SUPPORT COMMENT If not, then find an after school summer sport (best time to start)
SUPPORT COMMENT to lose weight you dont really need to too much exercise…what you really need is a change of diet. Reduce carbs and sweets

JESSICA—- I hardly eat anyway.

JESSICA—I’m graduating next year. I’m already doing an animal studies course which I’ll get my certificate next year if I make it there

SUPPORT COMMENT i guess you think that you’re fat… Dont worry about it much, every now and then we all put in some weight anyway…and then other times we also lose some too

SUPPORT COMMENT That’s great, you’re almost done
Take advantage of the forced exercise, you can still replace PE with an after sport if you aren’t too loaded with AP/college courses….

JESSICA—Im not fat I don’t think.. im 60kg 168cm

SUPPORT COMMENT That’s not fat im 60kg too, and im not fat

SUPPORT COMMENT When you get away from your family

SUPPORT COMMENT “When you are financially capable of moving out.”

SUPPORT COMMENT Sometimes ppl call other ppl fat because they look offence in that actually

JESSICA—Oh. I can/will in 2 years

Neil Pheeney Jess, listen up.. that whats called filthy rotten mental abuse… in your case its filthy child abuse

Neil Pheeney if you want to go into it we can discuss your mum or dad, as there will be a problem there, no one hit the daughter with this kind of filth unless there is something seriously with them..

Neil Pheeney its puk, but I call this abuse, custom abuse… its custom made to cause the most damage to your mind with the least effort. Not even trying to be sneaky just pounding away repitision style in the same spot trying do mess you up

Neil Pheeney you just here it and hear it, brainwash style, your brain cant process it so it goes round and round in your head and it should feel really horrible to you’’’’’’ they are you emotions getting message as from your brain that they don’t like over and over and over,,,,,,, and they don’t like these sort of messages,,,,,,,, they like nice things,,,, and truth,,,, not lies and filth,,,,,, and from your mum and dad,,,, I cant imagine how painful that is for your poor emotions

Neil Pheeney your young and still got time at home, assume its going to keep happening,

Neil Pheeney its abuse girl, when you hear it, you look at em and start to work out what is wrong with them to say such filth… they might not be even able to help it,,, there not rational, so there is no point responding back with any thing rational, it wont work.. you save that rational for your own good self to keep you mind from exploding ok..

Emily Smith Oh ok

Neil Pheeney JESSICA—R U OK,,, should I stop

JESSICA no I think you are right, it is how I feel… im just sitting here and I feel really nice at the moment

Neil Pheeney Yeah, that’s your brain being able to function and not thinking filth over and over…. It awesome that feeling… should be like a a srreal kind of feeling… will never forget it…….. you know it not true what that say don’t you


Neil Pheeney JESSICA—Jessica your on my list of favourite people ..
JESSICA—–Im so tired its 4 am and have not slept for 2 days

Neil Pheeney omg…….You’re an Aussie, me to… close your eyes and enjoy that feeling, see you around

SUPPORT COMMENT I got an idea for some cardio

SUPPORT COMMENT So keep going and hit the diet

SUPPORT COMMENT the medication will make you fat, and you cant get thin again, idont know what to do im 200 pounds and used to be 120 pounds

SUPPORT COMMENT Hey. Relax don’t listen to them. Your life will be better than theirs don’t worry
SUPPORT COMMENT Fuck EM all! Blood is not thicker than water, surround yorself with likeminded.. greetings from Sweden ..

SUPPORT COMMENT Sounds like you got the wrong family? It’s their problem, not yours. Be strong.

SUPPORT COMMENT Wow your an artist, I’m sorry it must have come from a very dark place, I admire you for your bravery to share it with us. Keep going there are brighter days. P.S. Would love to see more of your work

SUPPORT COMMENT Im thin. Im upset too. But girl its not the end of the world. Cheer up! Dont mind them.

SUPPORT COMMENT Stay strong hun. If you really need to get out talk to someone so you can get moved because mental/emotional abuse is just as back as physical

SUPPORT COMMENT Enjoy life rather than thinking
SUPPORT COMMENT How old are you?

SUPPORT COMMENT ou have the choice and the power to change Your life.

SUPPORT COMMENT Speak up and loud and often. Tell them how you feel. Tell them to put themselves in your place, how would they feel?

SUPPORT COMMENT And if that doesn’t work, speak to a counselor.

JESSICA—My counseler knows what’s going on

So we chatted some more in private and its not like she can leave, she is still at school, but she now only thinks about it from what is wrong with them, but doesn’t let on that she is not bothered as much,,, she seems like a very intelligent little girl and a bit of an actress to… She waits for the abuse and is not scared of it or shocked when she hears it, it confirms what she was thinking and looks to see what they are feeling when they abuse her, she even argues, tries to rationalise with them to stop but on her terms and its complete pretend.. she says she feeling heaps better and enjoys this game she is playing
Even when she is talking to her psych she is analysing her now, and can see when she says some thing she understands and can see the blank look in her face when she talking about the abuse..
Jessica is a bit is like doing really good, and its not often that you can have this type of effect, its just more about having someone understand them that helps the situation and with mental illness already with em for so long they cant fight much

It is all so easy to understand how the mind works. I can tell you that because I know how it works. Its not that big a statement until I say it like this. I’m the first person ever to know how the mind works, Then it becomes real hard to believe, but its true
To know how the mind works, you need to know how the brain works, how emotions work and how human instincts work. Then how mental illness works and then how recovery of mental illness works. The mind works a certain way and that’s fairly straight forward in all people and I think we even know how it works . Its more we don’t know how it doesn’t work.
The brain works a certain way, emotions work a certain way, Mental illness works a certain way too and how to recover from mental illness work the same. In a certain way. When you know how the mind works, to explain it all has to be even has to be done in a certain way.
It like this really big puzzle that pieces together very nicely, and like a puzzle, pieces need to go in there place. And that the same for the mind. If the piece doesn’t fit and there are bits missing the puzzle doen’t turn out and the understanding of the mind will be what the puzzle looks like. A persons mind can be a puzzle. Most of us pieced together something with a lot of help along the way and our life experience to get to this point we are at in our lives.
Most of us are in a spot and our mind feels good. Maybe ten or twenty percent don’t feel as good and have some sort of mental illness and it’s a bit more a struggle to get through life this way. The mental illness makes it real hard in truth. You think about things over and over everything seems worse than what it is and feels horrible thinking this way all the time. You don’t want to think like this but you cant stop thinking this way. You cant work out how to stop thinking this way either as your mental illness is making you think the other way all the time so it’s a struggle that never ends.

The main piece or pieces to the puzzle is the brain so lets look at how these pieces work from the beginning.
A brain works in a very straight forward way. It thinks about the information it encounters and trys to come up with a solution to help you through what ever happens in life basically. How your brain gets to the solution will come from what it has learnt though out its life.
At the beginning your brain hasn’t learned anything so there is nothing really it can think about but over time you learn things from what your brain goes through. You don’t have a choice what to learn, you learn what ever is there to learn.. Its up to your parents really. And it’s a step by step process.
And this is basically the most important concept to understand how the mind works. I’m a mathematician, so will explain it that way. People think I’m a maths genius, and I used to as well. Like this god gifted talent I have. I’m probably intelligent genetically, but its only noticeable with maths and other areas are lacking. In high school I ended up top in the state for maths, with no effort. I ended up in the lowest for class at school for English out of seven classes I was in number 7. I busted my balls towards then end to get a pass that got me to university and didn’t even count towards my final number as you could drop the lowest subject..
After many steps before this call the first step numbers. You learn what they are, what they look like and how to count and after a few years your parent will teach you what one plus one is. And you will never get it right the first time. You would have been this little kid with a parent the same way I was with mine trying your best like all kids do to answer this question. I had two apples, one in each hand. We had got to the step where I could ask how many apples do I have and he could say 2. But if I said what’s one apple plus one apple and held them in each hand in front of him he couldn’t say the answer.
During all the other steps over time as a parent your praising your kid as they learn things. Encouraging them with hugs and it makes a little child feel good and they just want to answer and use there minds as they love the interactions and as the parent your enjoying all this as well … you keep encouraging.
You even say the answer and when they repeat it, they still get praise and step by step you get to the stage and he knows what one plus one is… and then onto 1+2 and 1+3…. But a whole lot more is being taught here than you may think.. you are encouraging him to be able to think and he is getting confidence to use his brain each time as its fun and he enjoys the feeling of being praised and how he is learning and its all a new sensation for a child this and they love it…
Its how we are made, like our human instincts. They are to learn and to want to feel good from the love of our parents. The feeling inside we get from the love. From the encouragement, its all stuff we were made to want and how we are and as a child that’s as deep as it gets at this young age. Your just wanting some feeling that you like and you go that way…
Now your brain takes on this knowledge aster a while and helps it with the next step Also your brain is getting trained how to think, how to switch on and think for longer and longer. Over thousands of little things a child goes through in life there brain starts to have a way to think and there is some knowledge there to draw on, even a way to think and a level of concentration, an attension span and a level of confidence. Lots of other things are all starting to build.
Each little thing happening is just making every little bit of difference to the brain and in ther system that started off with nothing and is developing .. It started off with a cry and then they felt there aren’t soon after and now is to them thinking..
On the flip side where some of this interaction of just learning 1 and 1 was replace with nothing and the child is basically just laying ignored, they miss all this development and there brain is being taught to not switch on and be used and steps are being missed and they are going to encounter things one day that they will they need to of gone through and the brain to of experienced to understand and its not going to be there. Its going to be not understandable and how your brain works to process information will just switch off and think about what is possible
For example in an adult, you stick a page of Chinese writing in front of you and you don’t even think about it. Try giving teaching mathematics to a child who doesn’t know numbers and the brain will not even think, it will just shut down or think about something else and not possible to start to process simple calculations . You more likely starting to develop some form of adhd and that all that can happen..
Moving on from a young age I understood mathematics, I had an older sister that was teaching me and before I was 4 i had been through all the steps many times and my brain could think like this. I was confident with numbers and never missed a step. My brain just switch on as that it had been taught to and wanted to think like a brain will always do. I started school way ahead, I never sat there with out a step gone through and if asked I was confident I knew and never switched off when it came to this… I never memorised and didn’t understand and forgot anything.
Learning by memory with out understanding is completely different skill than understanding… when its understood you brain doesn’t even have to think and is available to take on all new information
Its how I worked out how the mind works as well. I didn’t even think about working it out. I just went through some things, A lot of things that allowed me to understand with a way of processing that was the only way I knew how. I was part of a big family and was great, but there was no encouragement to learn and missed steps with other things. I remember my schooling and the maths classes learning away. 30 years later I can still do it all. I don’t remember a thing about the rest… i would just switch off and didn’t have a clue what was going on and im sure I would of tried, but it didn’t make sense and the maths was able to drag me through and I got there no problem with zero effort for 14 years. It took me another 12 years to put in my first effort in life

There I no point trying to convince you of anything, read other blogs if you want,, im still documenting just the basics how the mind works… hope some people understand, its been a lot of work to get to here..